cv.cm

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Attachment style test

How do you act in close relationships? This quiz measures attachment anxiety and avoidance and places you in one of four styles.

Your answers are scored in this tab. Nothing is uploaded, saved, or sent anywhere.

How well does each statement describe you? Answer as you usually are, not as you would like to be.

  1. I worry that the people I love won't care about me as much as I care about them.

  2. I prefer not to show others how I feel deep down.

  3. I need a lot of reassurance that I'm loved.

  4. I get uncomfortable when a partner wants to be very close.

  5. When someone I love is away, I worry they'll lose interest in me.

  6. I find it easy to depend on people I'm close to.

  7. I get upset when my partner doesn't reply for a while.

  8. I value my independence more than closeness.

  9. I fear being abandoned.

  10. I feel comfortable sharing private thoughts with my partner.

  11. I rarely worry about being left.

  12. I pull away when a relationship starts getting serious.

  13. I often wish my partner's feelings for me were as strong as mine.

  14. I find it hard to let myself rely on others.

  15. I overthink small changes in my partner's mood.

  16. Turning to people I love for comfort helps me.

0 of 16 answered

About this test

Attachment theory began with John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth's studies of children and was extended to adult romantic relationships by Hazan and Shaver. Modern research measures two dimensions: anxiety (fear of rejection) and avoidance (discomfort with closeness).

Your style comes from where you fall on both: low on both is secure. This short quiz was written for cv.cm and is based on that two-dimension model. Styles can change with time and with supportive relationships.

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FAQ

What are the four attachment styles?

Secure (low anxiety, low avoidance), anxious (high anxiety), avoidant (high avoidance), and fearful-avoidant (high on both).

Can my attachment style change?

Yes. A long, stable relationship, therapy, and conscious practice can move people toward security, which researchers call earned security.

Should I answer about my current partner?

Answer about how you generally feel in close relationships, not only about one person.

Which style is best?

Secure attachment is linked with the most relationship satisfaction, but every style makes sense as a response to past experience, and each can grow.